C4 Doc: Divorce – Shariah Style « Inner Reflections Transcribed

C4 Doc: Divorce – Shariah Style

February 4, 2008 at 9:05 pm | In Culture, Gender Issues, Islam, Life, Men, Muslims, Patriarchy, Society, Women | 16 Comments

Yesterdays documentary Divorce – Shariah Style on c4 went through details of the work the Shariah council are doing in the UK, for which they are in demand by an ever increasingly aware Muslim population. The majority of their work and aired on the doc focused on divorce, financial and marital issues.

For purposes of the title divorce was discussed and some of the clients of the Shariah council presented to have their issues resolved or for advice. Most of the client base for purposes of divorce were women who were seeking khula, some who had been separated for a number of years from their estranged partners but who were unwilling to divorce their wives. What sort of a person would want to stay married to someone who doesn’t want to have anything to do with you?

One of the men in the documentary was a 20 something East Londoner. His story went something like this:

Imran and Nasira – a polygamous arrangement

Six years ago Imran, 27, went to Pakistan where his parents arranged for him to marry his cousin, Nasira, who joined him in London a year later. Far from her family and unable to speak English, and now with three young children, Nasira is completely dependent on Imran. ‘I came here thinking that he’d treat me well, wouldn’t hurt me … But he keeps hurting me on purpose so that I leave him, run away.’

Despite the palpable misery of both partners, Imran’s parents oppose divorce, saying that it would bring dishonour on them. Instead, they sanction Imran taking a second wife in Pakistan since, under Pakistan’s laws, a man may have up to four wives. Under British law, though, no one can have more than one spouse at a time, so Imran could not bring his second wife to live in Britain. Nasira is horrified that he has married a second wife and, after a massive row, Imran issues her an Islamic divorce and she moves away to Bradford. Under pressure from his family, though, he’s hoping the Sharia Council will declare his divorce invalid, and help him take her back

he insisted his parents co-erced him into marrying his cousin, even though he wasn’t interested and maintained he still did not love her or want to stay married to her. He still managed to have 3 kids with her in the space oftheir 5 year marriage so obviously wasn’t all that repelled! The cause of his problem was his parents. He couldn’t divorce her because it’d bring them and their family into disrepute, although they thought if him taking another wife made him happy then that is ok, but he can’t leave his 1st wife – he should keep them both! These kinds of attitudes aren’t imported from “home countries” or “foreign cultures” by 1st generation immigrants, they become indigenous and self-perpetuating when implemented and carried on by 2nd, 3rd or even 4th generation immigrants.

I thought it was a shame some of the women like Irum had been seeking khula for over 3 years. Her story is found below

Irum’s story

A Muslim woman has the right to ask the council to dissolve her marriage if her husband treats her with physical or mental cruelty (among many other grounds). If these grounds are established, the husband must give her compensation. Under Muslim laws, a woman also has the right to ask the council to dissolve her marriage even if she has no grounds, but then provided she compensates her husband. This latter is called ‘khula’.

Irum, 26, is living in a women’s refuge. She is separated from her husband, who is on remand awaiting trial on a matter unrelated to the marriage. Irum is applying to the Sharia Council for her divorce because her husband has refused to divorce her.

‘It was basically a conventional arranged marriage whereby his family approached my parents,’ says Irum. ‘We courted for six months, got on really well – love of my life so to speak – and we were married six months later.’ Things started to go wrong within a couple of months but, says Irum, ‘My marriage is a Muslim marriage and those vows are sacred and therefore it’s more important for me to go to the Sharia Council to get my Islamic divorce, more so than the civil.’ Although Irum sees the vows as ‘sacred’, in fact, unlike Christian marriage, Muslim marriage is a contract, not a sacrament.

According to the way the British Sharia Council applies Muslim laws, as a woman, she has to prove her husband’s unreasonable behaviour. So before the council will consider her case, Irum has to prove that her civil divorce is underway and that there are reasonable grounds for divorce – and the council also insists on getting her husband’s views. He writes to say he’s a changed man and wants another chance. Sheikh Hassan asks Irum: ‘Don’t you think that a person … can repent to Allah and can change?’ Irum replies: ‘I do. and that’s probably why I gave him as many opportunities as I had … but he has written dozens of letters like that to me. You know I tried to kill myself.’ Nevertheless, The council rules that she must wait until after her husband’s trial and have further discussions before they will grant a divorce, which Irum refers to as a ‘khula’.

The meaning and procedure for khula varies between different Muslim countries. Some say it requires the husband’s permission and others not. In classical Muslim jurisprudence, it is a divorce initiated by the wife without needing to establish any grounds and is based on a story about a woman who asked the Prophet’s ruling on the problem that she simply found her husband repulsive and wanted to end her marriage. The Prophet dissolved the marriage but ordered her to return to him the orchard he’d given her as a marriage gift

She eventually found respite but after such a long wait. She had her civil marriage annulled (I think?) but sought an Islamic annulment due to her faith. Why that took so long I am not completely sure. Surely it doesn’t take 4 years to obtain khula? What is the average waiting time? Is it similar in timescale to an annulment of a civil marriage?

There was a slight bias in the programme, but I’ll let you all state what that was. For those who watched the doc, what did you think of it?

16 Comments »

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The first case Imran is more guilty that his parents. He seems to be a capricious freak man. How he made 3 children and after that he doesnt want the wife anymore? Maybe bcs the wife was not enough fresh for him.

I dont think it takes 4 years to take Khula. If the man is not able to pay all once, they prepare a bank account for woman and man pay monthly. For example if khula is 20000 $, he pays 200$ every month until it be finished.
I dont know why there should be respite at all? when 2 persons can not live with each other and ask for divorce, means so many ties between them have been ripped.There is no way to stay more..

Comment by Shahrzad — February 4, 2008 #

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I found the fact that the waiting list for divorce is upto three months due to more and more cases submitted to the shariah council quite depressing.

Initially I thought it was a silly documentary but come to think of it now, there were several points it covered. It firstly made the link between the judge of the Shairah council Imam Suhaib Hassan who was also secretly filmed by the dispatches for ’spreading hatred’ – a report under immense scrutiny now- perhaps to malign the case for Government recognition. And secondly to support the Govt clampdown on ‘back home’ marriages by showing how much of a failure these so called arranged marriages can be. On the positive side, I think Irum made clarified the difference between culture and Islam, which she understands now. Alhamdulilah

Comment by Tia — February 4, 2008 #

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I am glad that in the UK there is some action on the issue of family law. In the United States, we are limited on the amount of services offered through the respected Islamic agencies.

Comment by Organic Muslimah — February 5, 2008 #

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It is high time the Islamic bodies did something about Muslim marriages in the UK. Pakistani marraiges are usually the most shameful.

I know this Pakistani man who married a Palestinian girl when they were in their early twenties only to divorce her, remarry her and divorce her again. He is now marrying a village girl from Pakistan who knows “how to keep her mouth shut”!

Comment by Achelois — February 5, 2008 #

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I don’t know why anyone would marry a 2nd wife when the 1st one is working just fine… unnecessary headache.

Comment by Haleem — February 5, 2008 #

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A definitely Muzlum problem – making things difficult when they should be easy.

Comment by Amina Ae Sook — February 5, 2008 #

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The Imran chap really peeved me off, more so when he stated to the Shaykh he had said “talaq” just to scare his wife. How very immature.

The 3month waiting list does seem a bit of a shame Tia, but isn’t the SCB a registered charity? Surely they can apply for more funding and/or recruit more volunteers. Im surprised they didn’t have any women working there considering their skewed client base.

Comment by Sumera — February 5, 2008 #

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I think SCB is a registered charity but has not been officially recognised by the Government as a body which can enact divorce procedures. This would mean, those Muslims who have entered the Islamic nikah can terminate their marriage on Islamic conditions rather than having to go through civil court procedures.. which are exhausting. I think some of the Islamic boards now have the ability to contract civil marriages as well as the Islamic nikah which saves the hassle of attending a registry, and if the same could happen for divorce it would enhance the role of the Shariah council.

Sumera, I really wish to see more Muslim women get involve in these kind of bodies, the scope is huge, we need not only admins, but professional counselors and shariah qualified women to sit on the consultation committee (shura) so they can represent the women well.

Comment by Tia — February 6, 2008 #

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How does one go about becoming shariah qualified? Its not a topic that most people are aware of. (Aside from the plethora of Islamic Study courses that don’t really amount to much in the end apart from being proficient in regurgitating drivel!)

Professional counsellors should definitely be working (volunteer) or at least affiliate themselves with SCB, I can’t imagine their services would go un-utilised.

Comment by Sumera — February 6, 2008 #

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I think shariah qualified in this case would just require them to understand or have formally studied the Islamic divorce law, esp when divorce law is straight forward and doesn’t require punishments. sometime ago I lectured an Islamic studies module at a London uni and surprisingly there were more non-Muslims studying BA Islamic law than Muslims.. so something like that should be sufficient imo

i agree Sumera Professional counsellors are a MUST considering how much Muslims need them likes of those in the documentary.

Comment by Tia — February 6, 2008 #

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Salaams one and all…

An interesting discussion on an interesting programme. There was much that we need to think through carefully here.

What did you all think about the proposal to introduce Shariah personal law into UK law?

Abdur Rahman

Comment by Abdur Rahman — February 7, 2008 #

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watched some of it, but had to switch it off, that imran guy was stressing me out. i wanted to reach into the screen and strangle him! nasira was a bit strange as well though..
i think like a lot of things, these things are sensationalised because they make good dramas, so i’m not sure how much of it i trust.
the issue of how divorce is dealt with in the UK is definitely a worry though.

Comment by hema — February 8, 2008 #

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This is quite a story. It is amazing to hear different cultures perspectives, beliefs, and actions when it comes to certain things. I just read an article at http://www.firstwivesworld.com the other day about middle eastern men whom are divorcing their wives through text messaging and technically, through their culture, it is a legal divorce. Very intersting, especially for me coming from a very strict Irish catholic background. Although, we don’t hold the divorce=bad doctrine of our more stricter religious bretherin. I’m a very liberal Catholic, and if someone feels divorce is neccessary for a better quality of life then go for it and live the life we were so generously given. Check out the article on http://www.firstwivesworld.com
Just my two cents
Ann Marie

Comment by Ann Marie — February 8, 2008 #

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I don’t see why a court system that works alongside the civil courts can’t be a possibility for those Muslims who want their affairs governed according to Shariah Abdur Rahman. But the current uproar as a result of the Archbishops comment focuses on the application of Shariah laws unto them who do not want them (non-Muslims and some Muslims alike). That is something which needs to be cleared up.

Hema – Imran annoyed me too. Nasira hung around because she has nowhere else to go to. Shame really.

Welcome to my blog Ann Marie and thank you for your comments. Yes I came across the text message divorce phenomenon not so long ago which I find quite strange and cowardly to be honest (and the polygyny thing I’ve touched upon before). Indeed if divorce is the only option left then it should be made available to them, I agree.

Comment by Sumera — February 8, 2008 #

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